The Best Career Advice I Got From RBG

The other morning, I was taking a leisurely walk in the park with my older grandson, enjoying the fresh air and the sound of his giggles.

And then, out of the blue, I overhear these two teenage girls sitting on the park bench who were glued to their respective cell phone screens.

They seemed to be having a mini meltdown over the number of likes on their Instagram posts.

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Seriously, one of the girls proclaimed that she was ready to delete the photo and message thread if it didn't hit a hundred likes soon!

‍I remember thinking that our society, sadly, was fixated on validation.

‍Once I was back home, I began thinking about how obsessed we've all become with social media feedback and the toll it takes on our self-esteem, especially for kids.

But here's the thing: I had to face my hypocrisy.

As a relatively new coach and blogger, I have to admit that I've fallen into the trap of obsessively checking likes and comments on my posts. It's like I need a quick ego boost now and then.

The ups and downs of views and comments have sometimes made me question myself.

Am I losing my mojo? Are my topics not hitting the mark? Is my writing just not cutting it?

And then, to top it all off, my wife storms into my home office, excited, and insists that I immediately read this article about career advice from the legendary Ruth Bader Ginsberg (RBG).

Now, I try not to argue with my wife, the boss, so I dove into the article. And it hit me hard!

RBG offered some profound wisdom she learned from her mother-in-law on her wedding day over five decades ago.

‍The advice? "In every good marriage, it helps sometimes to be a little deaf."

Who would've thought those words could apply to relationships and our careers and lives?

RBG knew the deal. She understood that while listening to others and considering their opinions is essential, we must also be confident to filter out the noise.

We have to stand firm in our convictions because, let's face it, that makes us who we are.

‍RBG's advice got me thinking, and I want to share three key takeaways that have helped me navigate this whole feedback frenzy:

Keep Facts Separate From Emotions

You will encounter some haters when you're going after big goals like RBG did. People will say things without thinking or be downright mean. So, here's what you do: focus on the facts. Strip away all the emotions they're throwing at you and look at what's REAL.

Build Immunity To Praise

We all want to feel loved and appreciated. It's a basic human need. But getting hooked on those likes, comments, and virtual pats on the back is like chasing an addictive high. It feels good at first, but if you rely on it too much, you'll end up frustrated and agitated. So, when people praise you, take it with a grain of salt. Don't let it define your worth.

Spot The Ego Boost Patterns

It's crucial to recognize when you're seeking external validation and why. Relying on others to boost your mood is a temporary fix that won't help you build a solid sense of self. Find new ways to feel good that aren't solely reliant on what people think of you. It takes practice, but trust me, it's worth it. Permit yourself to feel good from within.

Here's the real kicker: if you're like me and think you don't care about what others think but secretly get a little excited when someone likes your stuff, are you really deaf to their opinions? And sure, you might brush off criticism, but aren't you still hooked on that need for praise? Let's embrace the deafness that RBG's wisdom offers.

Step by step, we'll shake off the noise and embrace our authentic selves.

We'll paint our lives with the colors of self-acceptance, not for other's approval, but simply because we're awesome just the way we are. Let's rise above the noise, be a little deaf to the world's opinions, and dance to the beat of our convictions.

It's time to shine, not for the likes, but for the sheer joy of being unapologetically ourselves.